Tag: poems

so you failed at something. it happened, it’s over, can’t be fixed or taken back.
cry. sob your eyes out. slam your fist against the wall, again, both of them, press your face into something soft and yell. scream, loud and wild and disappointed, until your throat hurts and you want to hate the world. tell yourself or someone else how unfair, terrible and mean the world is. lie on your bed. drown your mind in pity until your mouth is full of sadness and everything is salt and cold water. when the room has gone silent around you, take a breath, deep, slow.
good.
raise your head.
find the horizon.
and walk.

moami

And he knew that he was loved
When this one didn’t try to make him adore this one more than anything, more than his own breath and the earth beneath his feet
But instead
Took his hand and asked him about the rainforest of his mind
Put this one’s lips on his shoulder and begged to learn about the night sky of his blood
Whispered a plea and wished to dead gods for him to see the twitch of his own muscles that could bear a roar of war-storms underneath
Instead of asking to be loved
This one leaned against him and spoke: I want to know how you love yourself
And when he could only answer that he had forgotten
This one watched, silent, just to say: May I stay and see how you remember yourself?
He thought about it, quiet, in the dark, and said: Yes. And then we can love me together, and you too, just as much.

Moami

“I know you want to hear that I love you,” Hajime tells him one day. Tooru is surprised – one minute they’re cuddling, and then Hajime reaches for his bag and pulls out a crumpled sheet of paper, his cheeks blushing a deep crimson. Tooru wants to ask what’s wrong, but Hajime just pushes the paper into his hands. “Just read it. I can’t say it out loud, so – please. This is for you. It’s yours.” 

And because Tooru is eternally curious and eager for Hajime’s words, he reads.

One day, my love, I’ll tell you 
How the white gold of your eyes
Conjured dawn’s kiss in my dead heart
Took my darkness with a smile 

And if silver dew of sadness
Crowns the blind spot in your chest
I will fight all of your battles 
I will lay your fears to rest

It’s quiet when Tooru sets the paper down. Hajime watches him, eyes flickering between the poetry and Tooru’s eyes. “Sorry if it’s bad.” 
But he goes silent when Tooru falls into his arms, silent tears on his cheeks, and curls against his chest like something tiny and vulnerable. “Don’t apologize,” Tooru whispers, kissing Hajime’s knuckles. “You gave me more than I love you, and that’s all I need. You gave me – you.” And Hajime just smiles, and holds him.