Tag: levi

Erwin doesn’t look back.

Not to his father death or a childhood of love being ripped apart by blood and soldier’s hands tearing his family apart, taking every soul he loved.

Not to the brave men and women dying at his command.

Not to the countless lives he saved.

Erwin doesn’t look back – except when he can’t spot the black horse by his side, outside of the walls, a small rider pressed to its slender back.

That’s when Erwin Smith turns his eyes, instinctively reaching behind, only to see a small frame of wildness slash through the air, blood evaporating as Levi lands back on his horse and throws him a calm, steady glance.

Erwin turns back to face forward.

Eruri Week Day 6: Reunion

The television became his new best friend.
Levi sits on the couch, snuggled into the only blanket that still faintly smells like Erwin. He clings to the green necklace – bolo tie, Erwin calls it – as if his life depends on it. The news come up. Levi empties the rest of his beer can and stares, unmoved, eyes narrowed into slits. He doesn’t want to cry again, it hurts and exhausts him and it doesn’t fucking brings Erwin back from war. Of course, they report from Afghanistan. There’s shots echoing through the screen, dust and blood on dead bodies.

No news. The soldiers that were taken as hostages are missing. Who did it? Levi doesn’t know. They don’t tell him. They don’t let him fly into that goddamn country and get Erwin with his own hands. If those men hurt him – if anything happens to him, that stupid idiot, why did Levi have to fall in love with a soldier, a goddamn leader. Someone so good, honest, loyal.

He drowns the fear in tears and more vodka.

Two days later, Hanji bursts into his and Erwin’s little house, their eyes flickering from the water welling up in them. Good news, they say, voice cracking, hauling Levi out of his blanket pile. They found him.
Levi collapses.

It doesn’t take another word. He’s crying the whole drive to the airport, because it’s been hours since they found the soldiers and they’re on their way back to England. Levi looks horrible, all bones and dark bags under his pale skin but he doesn’t care. The gate is crowded and Hanji gets on their tiptoes to look out for – there he is. Levi crashes through the crowd like he’s ready to kill any of them, for him, to get to him.

Let me, please, please let him be alright let him be good and whole oh god he’s alive alive –

He doesn’t see the missing arm. Levi collides with Erwin’s chest, arms flying around him, burying his face in the warm chest he’s missed for so long. And Erwin manages to chuckle, a weak smile on his lips, stubble on his chin and pain dripping from his eyes. “I’m home, darling.”

Levi sobs.

Reincarnation. What a strange word. Levi had found it in an old book in the library, next to esoteric shit about spirit travel and everlasting love. Fairy tales, children’s stories. He only took this one book and never brought it back. The habit of keeping what had once become his sat deep inside his soul. That way, he found Erwin, too.

Or did Erwin find him – yes, that was it. Waiting in front of the library, eyes calm, body shorter and hair silver already, and Levi stopped sharp. The book dropped. Bodies aged and wrinkled, but souls didn’t. Souls grew wide and magnificent and Levi’s fingers clung to Erwin’s coat as he flew, crashed into his arms. How long, his voice asked, cracking, breaking into shatters of sky and hope.

Too many, Erwin said quietly, his lips kissing Levi’s cheeks bleeding from tears. Centuries. Eras for you, an eternity. Souls didn’t age.
But they could melt. They could coalesce.

Eruri Week Day 4: Little Things / Eruri Insiders

It’s the little things.

Erwin indulges in the soft red colour tinting Levi’s ears whenever their fingers brush. The meetings of the Corps can be boring and straining, but their hands lace up under the table and Levi’s other hand around the tea cup shivers the tiniest bit. It’s the little things – when he returns from a mission, both of them covered in blood and filth, clothes torn where titan’s teeth almost tore them apart. When Levi comes out of the showers, naked, skin red where he scrubbed it clean, he presses his body into Erwin’s arms and buries his face against the chest where a heart beats just for him.

It’s the little things – Erwin’s hand brushing the small of his back before a mission, up to his neck, tightening around it, and Levi’s head rolling back into the touch as if he’s been born to fit against Erwin, as if heaven and hell themselves carved both of them from a single block of marble and tore them apart with whispered words of “go, find him in another life for he is all you wanted, all you need, and the little things that will stop the bleeding of your soul”.

Eruri Week Day 3: Home / Domestic

“I don’t care how long it takes. I won’t take my daughter home to a bedroom that’s painted like a rabid dog threw up all over the fucking walls.”

Erwin massaged the bridge of his nose. He set the paintbrush down and took a deep, long breath. Levi had his arms crossed, glaring at him from below with eyes that said “I will get my way or you will sleep on the couch tonight”. It was about their baby girl and Levi was acting like a mother hen trying to make the nest for her child the most comfortable in all existence of eggs and chickens.

“Fine,” Erwin finally said and Levi’s face lightened up. “We’ll repaint it. You happy now? It’s not like I’m covered in green paint already, but whatever.”

“I love you,” Levi quietly said and tiptoed to kiss Erwin’s nose, smearing more green from his cheek across his lover’s face. Then he jumped back, grinning widely and Erwin could only growl “oh no you won’t – !” before a paintbrush slashed across his already dirtied shirt and left a bright minty streak across green. They had chosen fresh colours for their girl’s room, and Levi (as the artist he was) had begun to paint the ceiling as a sky and the walls like a deep forest full of hiding animals and beautiful flowers.

Erwin had been allowed to paint the grass, and even there Levi had to correct him and correct some of his badly drawn shadows. He was covered in all possible colours, dots of red on the butt of his old outworn jeans, legs sprinkled with pink from the roses Levi had painted.

“You shouldn’t have done that.” His voice had lowered to a dangerous snarl, and Levi squeaked adorably when Erwin snatched him around the waist and rubbed his colourful face all over his lover’s neck and cheeks.

“Ew, you are such a dumbass, fuckin’ stop that!” Levi struggled and kicked in his hug and finally dropped against Erwin’s chest like a stone, nose nuzzling into his dirty shirt. A strip of sky blue was on his forehead, and Erwin pressed his thumb next to it, leaving a sunny yellow spot.

“I hope she’ll like us.” Levi breathed against his chest, hair ruffled into a mob of darkness with pink and orange tips where paint had fount its way into it. Erwin sat down on the floor where they had put the plastic foil, pulling Levi on his lap. Their foreheads pushed together, resting gently as Erwin cupped his face and brushed his nose against Levi’s.

“She’ll love us. Who wouldn’t love to have a father like you? You painted a world for her, Levi. A world.” Levi’s smile was a rare thing, shy and insecure like a deer hiding in the forest that bloomed around them.

“You’re right. She’ll be ours, and we’ll always be hers. Our little girl.”

Eruri Week Day 2: Sacrifice

It’s over, hope is gone, but Levi shakes his head into Erwin’s neck where his tears are soaking into the white pristine shirt. “No, no no no.”

“Levi,” Erwin says gently. “It’s alright. Shhh. Darling, please. I’m sorry.”

He apologizes even though it’s not his fault, it never is, because Erwin Smith is good and pure and Levi hates that he has to be loved by a man like him who’s all darkness and filthy corners and secrets lingering in his eyes. When Erwin falls asleep, Levi hiccuping and sobbing in tears by his side, a doctor approaches him. His coat his white, he’s young and his name tag says something Levi can’t read.

“You’re his husband?” He asks, softly, as if Levi is a tiny animal that might shy away. “Yeah,” he replies anyways, tears streaming down from red-rimmed eyes. The doctor smiles and Levi relaxes. He’s fine with gays, apparently. “There might be a way.”

Levi doesn’t even think about it twice. The doctor explains something about risks and that all operation carry the chance of death and that they don’t even know whether his kidney will be right for Erwin. They run tests on him, so many, and the miracle of a few little numbers on paper drive fresh tears down Levi’s cheeks.

As always, he and Erwin fit perfectly.

The doctors act quickly. The surgery happens a day later. Levi and Erwin wake up together, with scars on both of their bodies. Someone pushed their beds together, letting them touch and press warm lips together for a precious heart beat. Levi runs his hand over Erwin’s cheek and closes his eyes when a mouth whispers “I love you” against his forehead.
He swallows, nods. “Love you too,” he says with a dark voice and a little hope swinging in it.

Levi would sacrifice anything for him.

Erwin is unyielding. Only when a small, pale hand slips into one of his, grip tightening around his larger palm, squeezing till he feels warmth and a strong pulse beating into his rough skin – only then, Erwin’s shoulders give up their heavy tension and relax, and he lets his head fall back for shy kisses to be placed carefully upon his throat, Levi’s voice humming in satisfaction when he conquers his commander.

Eruriweek Day 1: Past / Memories

When his fingers trace the hollow of Erwin’s throat, adoring the dark hickeys he left behind with his teeth and tongue, Levi finds old memories on Erwin’s skin. Scars are stories. The one in Erwin’s hand (Levi kisses it, lips soft these days and old from time) has gone pale, faded. A mere white line where Levi’s sword almost pierced him. There are other marks on Erwin’s skin – old battle, fights against titans and humans. His left arm is heavy on Levi’s back, they’re lying chest to chest and Erwin’s ribcage hitches softly under Levi’s weight.

He remembers their first kiss, on the battlefield, titan’s blood evaporating from their bodies. Both horses lost, weapons broken, seeking a roof over their heads for the night in ancient ruins of what once was a tiny village. A thunderstorm. The death of Farlan and Isabel was still sitting in Levi’s bones like a disease gnawing at his flesh, and they had started to fight over something irrelevant – until Erwin’s hands were at his throat and Levi shattered like fragile glass, bending and flexing until the pale column of his breath was bare. “Do it,” he’d said, air pressing between gritted teeth. “Do… it.” Erwin had shaken his head. Slow, almost reverent.

Erwin had made Levi beg for his hands, lips, for his thick cock to fill him up in the right way, deep and dark and so new that Levi croaked his name until he was hoarse, raw, lost in Erwin’s controlled ferocious thrusts. This night, Levi’s nails had left streaks of red on Erwin’s back, one deep enough to bleed.

The most beautiful scar that Levi had ever given anyone.